Idle Tom strikes lucky … again
"Corn in Egypt!" That’s a phrase my dear old dad likes to use after some unbelievable miracle.
For it turns out that we’ve had another extraordinary offer to go out on a date with Idle Tom the Publisher. It seems that Saskia (Alert! This is not her real name! I made it up - in order to protect The Guilty) read The Well-Tempered Clavier and for some reason has come to transfer all her good positive vibes from the book onto my publisher.
Bizarre - but that’s how it is.
Now … I have to say that Saskia, from the look of her photo, is absolutely gorgeous. She is - and I can well believe it - "a part-time model". Would have fair old Tom a’drooling if he could get within 50 yards of her. What she does in the rest of her time, I don’t rightly know, but she does appear to have spent a lot of it fantasizing over Tommy.
Now Saskia comes from the London area, which is a little closer than Sly from Dunfermline (Tom’s first date for when he gets back from Argentina).
Here’s what Saskia says:
"Tom sounds great. I’ve read his blog at Legend Press and I’ve read yours too, and I’m not quite sure how much to believe. But if Tom’s truly available, then I’d love to meet him. I think it’d be fun!"
Well. I don’t know about the "fun" bit. I guess it’s all a matter of taste. It must be some sort of generational thing.
"Tom!" I said. "I hope these calls to your mobile in Argentina are costing you a fortune!"
"They are," he said. A bit grumpy. "You’re costing me about a fiver a minute."
"Good!" I said. "Then maybe you’ll pay attention to what I’m telling you! Every word that I utter must be worth about ten pence!"
"What do you want, anyway? Why are you pestering me?"
"Oh yes! I’ve got another date for you!"
"OK. Great. But can’t all this wait till I get back?"
"Just thought you’d like to be kept posted on the goings-on back in Blighty -"
"This is getting really expensive. Is there anything else?"
"Nope - that’s it. Any luck with finding a US publisher in Argentina?"
"I’d rather talk about my dates back in Britain -"
* LADEEEEEZ! Do you fancy a date with Idle Tom the Publisher, shortlisted to be Britain’s Youngest Publisher of the Year for an astonishing FIVE YEARS in a row?
Just contact me, and I’ll forward your details. Not a problem at all if you live in Australia, Antarctica, Iceland or even Pitcairn Island … my desperado publisher is more than happy to travel …
Could you stomach a date with this man? Contact me now!
